Finding Eden
by Tsukiko hoshino
Summary: Sometimes Paradise is lost before you even get a taste of it, sometimes you don't even know when you've found it again, and sometimes you have to fight to protect it. FFVII Novelization, Cloti
1. Sticks And Stones

Disclaimer: If I owned FFVII, it would be remade by now- using KH battle format.  
Special thanks to my Beta reader Love Tifa :D she's awesome.

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Finding Eden  
By: Tsukiko Hoshino

_A man who won't die for something is not fit to live.  
-Martin Luther King, Jr._

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Cloud was born to Fenris and Ophira Strife on a hot August day in a tiny mountain town known as Nibelheim. His hair was flaxen like his mothers, but his eyes were the same Ceil blue shade as his father's.

Like any other parent the moment he'd been placed into Fenris's arms and Cloud had looked up at him with passive blue eyes, he knew- he just _knew_, his son was meant for something special. It wasn't just the feeling that every parent had for their child, and he knew it; he could feel it down to his bones. There was something in Cloud's eyes that screamed it.

It had been about a year since that bundle of cloth and flesh had been placed into his arms. Spring was well on its way, the flowers were blooming, and the monsters were unfortunately repopulating around the edges of their small town. None of that however could compare or subtract from the happiness he experienced at home. His son was gifted, his wife was beautiful, and they were all healthy. Everything in his world was right.

Perhaps he should have known it couldn't last, but then…he was only a man.

"He's going to have trouble with the girls when he's older." Fenris joked to his wife that afternoon as he shifted the clinging infant in his arms.

The boy was only a year old, but he was different from other children. Where most toddlers his age were figuring out that crayons were not for eating, Cloud was walking and using those same crayons to draw rather elaborate scribbles on their walls; much to his father's delight and his mother's vexation.

Ophira gave him a teasing smile from over her shoulder as she chopped a few vegetables. "Mm…if he's as pretty as his father I bet he will."

"Handsome." Fenris interjected quickly, wrinkling his nose. "Girls are pretty, and daddy is not a girl, right Cloud?" He questioned as he pressed his forehead against Cloud's. Being called pretty was not something he appreciated, considering he'd been teased about his feminine face and stature since adolescence.

Cloud pressed his sticky hands on his father's face, doing his best to parrot the older man's words. "Daddy is a girl." He cooed as sympathetically as a toddler could.

"Thanks for your support." Fenris responded dryly as he plunked the boy into his high chair.

Cloud spared his father a smile as if he had heard his father's thoughts; his small hands reaching and grasping the necklace dangling from Fenris's neck. That silver wolf which his father referred to as _howling storm_ hung from his father's neck with its empty eyes gazing forth, as though it knew all. Within the creatures fearsome jaws was clenched a clear glass orb containing lightning materia. Rather than finding the effigy frightening, he found it to be a soothing; it was a constant. In his short life, he knew to associate that where the pendant swung, his father was there as well.

"Someday it'll be yours." A flash of pride ran through Fenris, as he fluffed Cloud's blond locks. "Hey… Tell me again why did you name him Cloud?" He wondered, glancing at his wife from across the kitchen.

The sound of a knife meeting wood paused, as Ophira glanced at him wryly. "Well if you'd been there when he was born, you wouldn't be asking, now would you? Besides you've heard it all before!" She laughed slowly at his guilty slump.

"I like to hear about it, and would have been there if I was able too." Fenris mumbled, making his way across the kitchen to embrace her.

Ophira hummed, and wrapped her arms around his waist. "I know." She smiled at him teasingly. "As for why I named him Cloud…When I looked at him for the first time, I was filled with worry." Ophira stated, looking at the child in question, who had once more busied himself with his crayons.

"I thought will he be healthy? Will he live a happy life, or be shadowed by bad things? I thought about the things that every parent thinks, and then I remembered something you told me." Her brows smoothed out, as she began to smile. "Do you remember?"

"Maybe," Fenris teased, taking in her happy face. _'If one could only freeze time...'_

Brown eyes shined back at him, studying his face intently, committing the look in his eyes to her memories. "You said to me, that every cloud had a silver lining…and I wanted to pass that hope onto our son. So that no matter what the troubles were that he would face in the future, he would be able to smile." She said. "Besides…" Ophira began, before Fenris kissed her briefly, pulling away with a knowing smile on his lips.

"Besides, his eyes are blue, like the sky." Fenris finished for her knowingly, laughing when she halfheartedly swiped at his chest.

"Don't make fun of me." Ophira huffed turning back to her cutting board.

"I'm not." Fenris denied, unable to wipe his smile away. "I like his name. I like what it stands for." He admitted, turning to look at Cloud, who by now was tossing his crayons onto the floor in boredom.

Ophira nodded her head knowingly, as she gazed out at the dark clouds.

"Will you be going out tonight? It's going to rain." She always worried when he left to deal with the large monster populous.

"I'll be going with Lucian." Fenris stated comfortingly, as though it that were the safest thing one could do. He kissed her cheek lovingly. as he made his way back to the table where he'd been sharpening his sword.

"The monsters out there are getting a little too comfortable with wondering into town, it's dangerous work but somebody has to keep the town safe from all the beasties, right Cloud?" he questioned, leveling himself to look in his son's eyes.

Cloud responded by nodding his head duly.

The fair haired Ophira nodded her head, still feeling slightly worried. "That reminds me, Leon and Irene had their baby yesterday…They named her Tifa." She smiled, turning to look at her husband as she leaned against the kitchen counter.

"A girl huh?" Fenris smiled slowly. "Hope she takes after her mom, 'cause her dad's a total bear."

"You mean lion." A new voice joked from the kitchen's open back door. "You really shouldn't talk about your best buddy's brother like that." Lucian stated with a grin, inviting himself into the house. "Even if it is true."

Fenris brushed it off, and grinned back at his childhood friend. "Whatever happened to knocking?"He griped jokingly.

"I did knock; you were too busy being all mushy with your wife to hear though." Lucian pouted as he ruffled Cloud's unruly hair. "Geez…This kid's hair looks more like a chocobo's a- ahem…butt every day."

Cloud smiled, and bid him hello. "Idiot!" He was quick to hang his head in shame when his mother scolded him for being impolite. '_That's what daddy calls him though.'_ His golden brows furrowed in confusion.

"Your father isn't supposed to say things like that either." Ophira stated as if reading his mind all the while giving her husband a dirty look, at which he made great show of recoiling, as if to say, _why I would never_! "Much less teach _you_ things like that."

"Ah, it's okay Ophira." Lucian smiled flirtatiously if anyone else had smiled at Fenris's wife like that, they would have been nursing a rather bruised lip. But it was Lucian, and the two were thick as thieves. "It's good that Cloud is developing his vocabulary." He jokingly attempted to cajole her.

Ophira on the other hand was not to be taken in. She fixed him with a rather blasé gaze and began shaking her head at him as she spoke. "I only wish he were learning things more worthwhile."

"Well…being able to spot a fool is a good life skill." Fenris informed wisely.

"Yes, I certainly wish I had been able to do so, if I had I would have saved myself a lot of trouble." Ophira agreed with a smile, sometimes he made it too easy.

"Ouch, sounds like she was referring to you." Lucian informed his friend with a cat-like smile from behind his hand.

Fenris sighed. "No respect."

"No respect." Cloud chimed in agreement.

Lucian's attention turned back to Cloud. "It's entirely your fault that this poor guy is going to be doomed to the nickname Chocobo-boy." He stated in mock mourn.

"Hey…These locks got me my lady." Fenris pouted, as he suavely ran a hand through his light brown hair. Pointedly, he ignored the quiet snort Ophira gave from across the kitchen.

Amiably Lucian clapped his hand on Fenris's back. "Of course they did," he stated with the ever cheeky smile. "Kiss the wife good bye, and hopefully we'll get back before dinner." With one last ruffle to Cloud's already well abused and unruly hair he sauntered his way out the door, pausing to bid his own farewell to the lady of the house.

"Be safe," Ophira called to him, before looking into a pair of pale blue eyes. "The same goes for you." Try as she might, she could not shake the fear that gripped her heart. She wanted so badly to grab him by the lapels and keep him home with her. It was selfish, and irrational of her, if the monsters around the area went unchecked they'd only cause worse trouble. So instead, she kissed him good bye, lingering longer than usual.

Fenris pulled away slowly, giving her one last kiss at the corner of her mouth, smiling coyly as he pulled away. "Be back soon, it's a promise!" he called, strolling his way towards the door, giving pause to kiss his son's forehead.

"Bye bye," Cloud bid waving his small hand briefly, before turning back to the crayon tossing game.

Fenris smiled, and echoed his son's sentiments. "Bye bye." He said closing the door behind him.

The sky was dark gray when they made their way through the outskirts of town. Even for spring, the amount of creatures they came across was staggering compared to their other routine hunts. Fenris was rather sick of Zū trying to bite his arm off, or beat him in the head with their wings. _'Surely they are the most useless birds in existence.'_ Or maybe just the most annoying ones, they did after all have penchant for eating Kyuvilduns.

"Something seems strange," Lucian stated his brows knit in contemplation as he looked towards the old wooden bridge. "Like…they're running away from something- and I don't mean us."

Fenris paused in wiping his sword clean. "Think it has something to do with the Mako reactor?" Ever since that thing had been installed the environment had begun declining. Plants were wilting, animals were fleeing or dying. While things seemed suspicious, no one made any move to complain; what was the point when no one would listen - Shinra would do as it pleased regardless.

"One way to find out," Lucian suggested roguishly, his left hand on his hip as he pointed in the direction of Reactor with his rifle.

Really, Fenris had been hoping he_ wouldn't_ say that. Something about those reactors set off warning bells in his head, bells which had served him very well in the past. "Right…" He said with a sigh knowing he couldn't persuade Lucian to turn back- nor could he allow his friend to go without him. In other words, he had no choice, with that in mind Fenris slung his sword on his back, making sure to check that his own firearm was fully loaded.

They set off across the wooden bridge in stealth learned from hunting and war they had foolishly fought long in their youth. The sound of propellers made itself known as they crept closer. They knew that cover was vital to being unnoticed as they peered out from behind a rocky crevice, carefully hiding from sight. People in suits rushed to and fro, shouting orders as a large clear tank was unloaded from the helicopter.

"What the hell is that?" Lucian murmured, squinting his eyes.

There were at least ten Turks, and a few men in white coats- Researchers or something trying to lug the crystalline tank into the reactor.

Fenris was quiet as he observed what was inside the tank; it was vaguely reminiscent of a human female, with pale blue-grey skin and long silvery white hair. 'Shinra, Shinra…what are you up to now?' His perplexed expression was soon replaced by a frown, as Lucian crept forward slightly - an ill attempt to try and get a better look. Fenris reached out to grab the man by the shirt and yank him down, only to be startled by a gun shot.

Someone had apparently sighted Lucian.

"Fuck!" The brunette hissed, dropping back down behind the rock to nurse his bleeding arm.

It became apparent by the bullets ricocheting off their hideaway, and the cry of intruders being sounded that they had seen something they shouldn't.

Fenris really wished he had not stepped out of bed that morning. "I don't think they're going to let us live if they catch us." Especially since they seemed to be under the 'Shoot first, ask questions later.' mindset. "If we try to flee, we could put the town in danger." That was something he was not going to do. This was not how today was supposed to end. How did a routine patrol turn into a life or death situation?

"Gee you think Captain Obvious?" Lucian seethed still smarting from his wound. He quickly poked his head out from behind the rock, only to jerk back- narrowly avoiding a bullet to the head. "They're starting to rush, got a plan?" He wondered, using a utility knife to pry the bullet out of his shoulder. The pain was excruciating, but the potion would take care of it later.

For a moment, his partner in crime was silent, his eyes closed in contemplation.

"We're outnumbered, and out gunned," Fenris frowned. "What ever it was that they were toting into the Mako reactor must be top secret. You know how the Turks work, they don't bribe to keep secrets, and they kill." There was so little time to think, he could already hear rushing foot falls approaching their hideaway.

"Running away isn't an option without endangering everyone." If they were willing to kill two innocent people to keep a secret, it wouldn't surprise him if they would kill a whole town. With that in mind, Fenris whipped out his pistol, and fired from over the rock- listening as there was a grunt.

"Fight to the death then, huh? I hate those prospects." Lucian sighed, sipping the last few drops of a potion. They'd already seen war- they'd looked death in the eye before and spit in his face. Surely they wouldn't get away with that twice.

Fenris smiled grimly. "I don't want to die here either… But I don't think we have much of an option. If they think we're out there somewhere, they'll continue to go after us. It's better to stand our ground and fight." Turks were trained to be observant, there was no doubt they'd committed Lucian's face to memory, and he was not about to abandon his friend. Even if he did, they would probably catch him. _'Besides, a true man turns and faces his problems head on.'_

"What a sap! Looks like our luck finally ran out, huh?" Lucian smiled, though the situation was grim, he had to agree. He had a new born niece and a wife of his own; He could never live with himself knowing he caused them harm even if it was inadvertent. "Sorry for getting you into this," He paused, placing a hand on his companion's shoulder.

A smile slowly bloomed on Fenris's face. "Don't be." Wheat colored hair swayed as he shook his head. "There's no other guy I'd rather go down with in a blaze of glory." He joked, clapping Lucian on the back roughly.

"Hmph." Lucian responded, biting his lip for a moment.

They crouched behind the rocks, ready to spring like wolves upon their prey. As soon as they heard rushing feet in front of them, they sprung, firing off well places shots upon their enemies.

The first drops of rain had begun to fall when they had leapt over the rocks, making the ground slippery with mud. They were used to the slick turf, giving them an advantage over their suited adversaries.

That night the mountains were alive with the sound of crackling firearms and shouting. All the while Nibelheim slept peacefully.

For Fenris everything seemed to blur together, he couldn't remember the faces of the people he'd struck, shot, electrocuted or slashed. They were all suits to him, wearing [b]lue, white, and black in the dark of the night. He caught Lucian's brown eyes as he jerked his head towards a patch of rocks – a call to retreat briefly.

A sharp pain ripped through his side as he sprinted and dove over them, he was sure a bullet had lodged itself somewhere in his torso. Lucian joined him seconds later, looking like he was fairing much worse.

"How many bullets do you have left?" Fenris wondered, wincing as said projectile whizzed just over their heads.

"A few shells." Lucian admitted, he unlike his friend did not have a back up weapon.

There was a moment of silence, while Fenris licked his bottom lip nervously. "Listen….I know we agreed to do this together, but there's something I need you to do." His free hand ripped the necklace from around his neck.

"You can't be serious!" Lucian hissed as the ornament was placed into his hand.

Fenris grasped the hand holding his pendant, hoping it would bless his friend with swift feet. "I promised Cloud it would be his someday…if they get us, they'll leave nothing behind. I can't keep my promise to come home, but I can do the next best thing." His voice was pleading as he searched Lucian's eyes. "Don't make me beg."

"I got us into this, why not go yourself?" Lucian's voice was pleading.

There was a sigh, as Fenris shook his head wildly. "I can keep them busy longer…we don't have time to argue, just go!" Part of him just didn't want to have to watch his childhood friend die. It was easier playing the martyr.

"I'll come back." Lucian promised, clutching the charm in his hand, as he nodded his head resolutely. It was said more to himself than anyone else.

"Go on then." Fenris smiled wolfishly, before springing back over the rock's his foot catching someone in the jaw. So far, they had taken four Turks down out of the ten they had seen. The others, while wounded were still able bodied.

With one last glance behind him, Lucian took off running; he made a few yards before he felt a shot rip through his lungs. For a moment he stumbled and wheezed, coughing and splattering blood into his hand as he continued to stumble his way through the sparse forest. The shot was lethal in the condition he was in, but he kept going, the will to complete his task the only force driving him.

The man who had fired the shot made no move to follow him, knowing he wouldn't survive long enough to tell any secrets.

Fenris fared no better as someone tackled him from behind, and they went down in twisted limbs and awkward punches. There was a flick of silver between them, as something sharp pierced his side – but still he struggled, bringing his knee up to his opponents gut and tossing him over his head.

"Not half bad, but you're fighting a losing battle." A male voice stated, leveling a gun to Fenris's head.

Fenris replied tongue in cheek. "A-aren't we all?" He couldn't remember a time in his entire life where he had been in such pain. The rain was pouring down hard now, but he could see the features of the man with the gun clearly. Black haired and amber eyed.

"Why didn't you run when you had the chance?" Was the inquisitive question from the man Fenris named Amber –because calling him Blacky just didn't fit.

Closing his eyes, Fenris leaned his head back. "A real man faces his problems head on." He wondered if Cloud would grow to be a man who took those words to heart as well. That was his last thought as the trigger was pulled.

The next morning, Lucian's body was found in the town square, clutching the charm in his hand, according to the coroner, he'd bled out. Fenris's charm was placed into Ophira's trembling hand that morning by Leon. No words were spoken between them. There never would be again.

No one knew what to think.

Just who had killed Lucian remained a mystery. Soon everyone assumed there had been some sort of altercation between the two on the mountain side, ranging from them getting into a fight, to Fenris abandoning his friend. Without any proof, they remained as rumors; Rumors that none the less affected their attitude towards his son and the wife he left behind.

No one suspected that something new – something dangerous was now lurking inside the reactor. Why should they? Shinra was a good, wholesome, family oriented company, out to better the lives of the average citizen.

Why Ophira stayed in the town was a mystery to anyone but herself. There was nowhere else for her to go. She'd been born and raised in Nibelheim and all the memories she had regarding her husband had sprouted in the area. It was painful to stay sometimes, but it would have been worse to leave. Instead she made a modest living as a seamstress and raising Cloud.

Years passed by as Cloud grew up amongst the dirty looks and whispered accusations. Children teased him for having no father, but he held his head high. He didn't need anyone but his mother he'd tell himself when they scorned him. He'd grown used to it and slightly bitter over the few short years he'd lived.

Cloud knew he was different from them, less childish and wiser. So why should he conform himself to their standards? No matter what, he wouldn't do it, no matter how unbearably lonely he became.

Though Tifa and Cloud had lived across from one another their whole lives, their interactions were few.

There were times when Tifa would invite him to play, and Cloud would very politely, but curtly decline.

He had no problem with the brown haired girl, but rather with the company she kept.

Secretly he'd always admired Tifa from afar. She wasn't exactly like the other children. Yes she was childish at times, but she was also sincere. Never once had she said something unkind to him, nor did she idly stand by and allow others to mock him. Some boys would have felt embarrassed about having a girl defend them, but Cloud didn't mind at all, not when it was Tifa.

He was eight, about to turn nine and she was seven. That day was the first time he was truly captured by her smile –not her usual happy go lucky one, but something else, something more heart rending. It started out like any other day; he'd been sitting in his yard amongst the sparse grass idly reading a book when Johnny and the rest of his ragtag group strolled down the cobbled street, presumably on their way to see Tifa.

"Well if it ain't Cloud!" Dan crowed safely from the opposite side of the fence, Wel and Meiday snickered to themselves from behind him.

"Aint isn't a word." Cloud responded dully, never lifting his eyes from his book.

Dan's face was probably turning pink from embarrassment. 'Not that I care.' Cloud told himself, not truly paying attention to his book anymore.

Today, Cloud did his best to ignore the pudgy boy and the twittering idiots behind him as he flipped a page in his book. Apparently, Dan didn't know how to leave well enough alone. _'That's nothing new.'_ He mused.

"Hey! Are you deaf as well as dumb!" Dan cried from across the fence, his round face becoming red. "I bet your dad was just as dumb as you!"

Cloud snapped the book shut as he leapt over the fence, tackling the larger started boy to the ground. "Take that back!" He hissed, punching Dan in the mouth and cutting his lip open. He wasn't sure who, but someone had pulled him away and kicked him in the face. He sat on his haunches for a few seconds, feeling the blood from his nose drip down slowly.

Thankfully before any more damage could be done, the sound of a wooden gate creaking open, followed by being slammed shut could be heard as Tifa made her way towards them.

"Hey!" The brunette frowned, her hands on her hips as she looked at the group surrounding him discouragingly. Although she had lived across from Cloud her whole life, she couldn't say that they were close. He was quiet, and often times she was unsure of how to approach him. "I don't want to see you guys picking on him."

"But Teef," Dan cried, pointing a finger at Cloud accusingly. "He started it!" he shouted viciously.

Cloud said nothing, as he wiped his bleeding nose.

"I don't care; he's out numbered four to one." Tifa stated, as she brushed past them, rummaging in the left pocket of her yellow and black jumper. "Here," She stated, pulling out a handkerchief to press against his bleeding nose. "If you tilt your head up, it'll stop faster." She advised wisely, gracing him with a small smile.

There were times, when he wasn't looking that she'd gazed across from her window into his, studying him thoughtfully.

To her, Cloud was an enigma; He was quiet unlike the other boys she hung around. Sometimes he'd say something to them, and cause a tussle, but despite them being her friends, she felt they deserved it. Cloud only had his mother, and it was wrong to tease someone for not having a father. Even though because of that, a lot of people whispered about his family, he always held his head up high. She liked that about him.

Cloud nodded numbly, tilting his nose back as instructed.

"Tifa…" Johnny began, his mouth set into a frown. Nobody liked to be scolded by Tifa, even though she was only six she could make anyone feel guilty.

Tifa turned to look at the group of four, her hands dropping limply to her sides. "I can't play today…my mom's sick, so you guys just run along, okay?" She shooed them.

Reluctantly they dispersed, finding no reason to stick together if Tifa refused to play. She always came up with the best ideas and the most imaginative games to play. Without her it just wasn't the same.

"You really shouldn't egg them on." Tifa mused, glancing at him. "But then I suppose they should keep their mouths shut." She contemplated

"I can't help it…They get under my skin." Cloud said weakly, before lowering his voice as he changed the subject. "Sorry about your mom." He stated sincerely.

Although her mouth was smiling, it did not reach her eyes. "It's fine. She'll be okay." She wanted to believe that more than anything. The voice echoing in her ears didn't sound convincing at all.

It didn't sound convincing to Cloud either.

There was a moment of silence, as he deliberated on what to say next. He was never good with words, it was another reason he was so quiet aside from wanting to avoid confrontation.

"You can take it off your nose now, it should have stopped bleeding." Tifa interrupted his train of thought. She was looking at the ground contemplatively, as though she wanted to say something else, but couldn't find the way to word it.

Cloud nodded his head, and tucked the soiled cloth into his pocket. "Thanks, sorry for the trouble." He stated awkwardly, unsure of what to do with himself as he shifted from foot to foot.

Tifa smiled slightly. "It's fine. Hey…do you…do you mind if I ask a question?" She wondered quietly, sitting on the curb just outside his yard.

A little hesitantly, Cloud shook his head. "N-no…" He trailed off, sure that this was the most he'd ever actually spoken to his neighbor.

"Is that a- no I can't ask, or a no, you don't mind?" A vaguely teasing smile crossed her face for a second, before her eyes became somber. "You might not like my question." Tifa warned quietly.

"I don't mind." Cloud responded resolutely.

Tifa gave him a tiny, almost nonexistent smile, as she spoke softly. "W-what's it like to lose a parent?" Her voice trembled slightly as she pressed her forehead against her knees. It was embarrassing having to ask him such a question. 'He'll probably be upset with me.'

The fear in her voice was so palpable, he could almost taste it; it was a bitter thing that slithered through his chest and clenched at his heart. Tifa was not meant to sound like that. "I didn't really know my father," Cloud stated, kicking a pebble across the street. "So I don't know. But…Tifa, you shouldn't worry about unnecessary things." He stated wisely, staring at the sunflowers which bobbed lazily in his front yard.

"The doctor said she might not get better though." Wine-red eyes trembled with tears, before they hid themselves in scraped up knees. "I don't want her to die." Tifa sniffled as her shoulder began to shake, trying to hold back tears.

If Cloud hadn't been uncomfortable before, he certainly was _now_. He'd never seen Tifa cry like this before. Not even the time she'd broken her wrist last summer. "The doctor said she _might _not get better. That means she might." He pointed out, biting his lip briefly. "I don't think…she would be happy to see you like this." His hand was timid as he placed it on her shoulder comfortingly. "She'd want to see you smile." He hoped that what he said would make her feel better.

There was a slight nod as Tifa lifted her teary face out of her knees, offering him a weak smile. "I think this is the most I've ever heard you speak."

Cloud simply smiled shyly. "I guess I don't have a lot to say."

Tifa placed her hand over his briefly. "I don't think that's the case at all…You should come play sometime." She stated, getting to her feet as her father called from across the street. "I gotta go…but thanks a lot Cloud." This time her smile was bright – almost as bright as it used be. "I feel a little better now." She said, breezing past him.

"Anytime…" Cloud murmured softly, watching as she disappeared behind her white picket fence. His heart continued to beat erratically for moments after she left, and the hand that she'd touched felt warm. Although the smile she gave him had not been as vibrant as the others she cast away freely, it had been aimed at him and him _alone_. It was something for him to hold onto and claim for himself - no one else. Without even thinking, a smile tugged the edges of his lips.

Maybe someday _he_ would be the one to asking her to come play.

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Well…I got bit by the Cloti bug, so sue me. I write for _fun _(reviews however are more than appreciated! *Wink wink*

This story will be following the FFVII Compilation closely. There will however be slight changes, and additions. (Plenty of Cloti scenes :D 'cause really that's the whole purpose of writing this.) The real challenge will be fight scenes, which I will try not to do many of. Fenris and Lucian were used as a bit of practice.

Interesting note, the names Fenris and Fenrir were both derived from Norse mythology- as was the town name Nibelhiem, expect to see a lot of norse terms or illusions. I'll be trying to keep in tact with that sort of feel.

Edited on Jan, 24, 2011


	2. To Protect

Disclaimer: I don't own it, and never will. Thanks for rubbing the salt in my wounds and THEN squirting lemon juice in them.

Big thanks to all the reviewers, and a bigger one to Love Tifa for beta-ing and being my muse. If it weren't for her this wouldn't be here.

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_Finding Eden  
By __Tsukiko Hoshino_

_A man without ambition is dead. A man with ambition but no love is dead. A man with ambition and love for his blessings here on earth is ever so alive.__  
-Pearl Bailey_

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Soon the bright, clear blue skied summer changed into a crisp golden autumn with red and yellow leaves. Autumn came and went, falling into a stark, icy white winter. During that month the ground was almost never free from snow in the sleepy mountain town, much to the delight of most children and the annoyance of their hard working parents.

Tifa's mother got no better following her and Cloud's hopeful discussion. She suffered immensely from her mother's raging illness and seeing her like that was hard for everyone and but it felt especially hard for Cloud. He wanted to comfort her, but he didn't have the words or the courage. He could never bring himself to say something. It was the way she looked at him, like she wasn't seeing him at all- lately she looked at everyone like that. Tifa seemed to lose the sparkling warmth that used to draw everyone close.

Even at the tender age of nine he cursed himself for not finding a way to say or do something to lessen her pain. But he couldn't turn back time and change the past. Instead he took his frustrations out by becoming even more violent, lunging whenever one of the other children rubbed him the wrong way, which was often enough.

Yuletide came and went, the usual party the Lockhart's threw never came and the year ended unspectacularly, as though predicting the events to come. January's chilling breath warmed into spring breezes, and the snow melted away to reveal spring greenery.

The month Tifa turned eight was not a happy one. The week just before her birthday, Irene Lockhart had passed away. The day of the funeral service was warm and bright, with clear skies. Everyone in the town showed up, even Ophira. She gave quiet condolences to Leon- the first words they'd spoken in years. He thanked her in the same quiet tone, before continuing on to greet everyone else.

His daughter stood off to the side, close by the casket, her eyes staring at nothing in particular as she thought to herself.

She hated it. She hated the big black box they'd put her mother in, She hated the nice shaded spot under a tree they'd situated the grave at; she hated the simple white flowers they used.

Tifa hated it all…but what she hated most was that she'd never see her mother's smiling face again. To never again feel her warm arms enveloping her was a horrible thought. It made her chest ache. '_It's not fair_.' She thought sadly, watching them lower the sleek black coffin into the ground- too young to realize that there would be many moments of unfairness in her life. The dark haired girl shed no tears though; instead her hands clenched the edges of her black dress. 'Tears aren't going to bring her back.' Tifa thought bitterly.

Cloud could see her knuckles turning white from where he was standing, his own hand clasped in his mother's tightly. More for her comfort than his own, even if he was holding back just as tightly as she was. Tifa…she looked so empty standing there. _'It would be better if she just cried,'_ He'd thought to himself, wishing she would show some sign of life. Her blank eyes reminded hi too much of the dead. 'Anything would better than nothing.' But she never cried, not through the whole memorial, not even when Leon Lockhart gently guided her away from the fresh grave.

Cloud worried about her that night, more than he'd worried about _anything_ he could remember in his nine meager years of life on the planet called Gaia. "I should have said something." He said to himself, glaring at his ceiling. "What kind of idiot am I?" He didn't bother trying to fall asleep, as he laid awake in the suffocating dark.

The clock on his bed side table ticked at him mockingly, as if it agreed with his sentiments. "Shut up." Cloud mumbled, stuffing it into a drawer. The incessant ticking and tocking continued, only muffled by its wooden confines. He laid still for a few moments, listening to the clock tick quietly, its rhythm never faltering, never stopping.

Like a heart locked up tight in a box. Something about the thought suddenly the room felt too hot- too humid to sleep.

With a heavy sigh, he tossed the covers aside; crawling towards the window, the crisp and cool breeze felt good against his warm skin. But the peaceful moment was short lived when his ears caught the quiet sounds from across the road. _'Tifa…'_ Cloud thought, pulling the curtains back to peer outside his window.

Tifa's bedroom from across the lane was lit up dimly right across from his; her gauzy white curtains were open and fluttering about from the gentle wind. Even though it was dark out, the moon dimly illuminated their street; he could see her dark brown- almost black hair spilling over the edges of her window sill.

With a sigh, he leaned his elbow against the ledge of his own window. _'Tifa…' _He hated himself for not having the courage to say it out loud. He wondered what would happen if he called out to her from his window. Would she hear him? What would she say? What would he say? When it came to the other children he had no trouble opening his mouth and inserting his foot, it was different when it came to Tifa. He didn't care how he sounded to the others, but he wanted to sound eloquent, brave, and sure of himself whenever he spoke to her. Three things he was sure he'd never be. That night he stayed up with Tifa as she cried, even though she didn't know it.

For a whole week after the funeral he never caught sight of her again except through the window. Tifa didn't even leave her room the day of her birthday-not even when Johnny and the others went over to see her. They were all sent away.

Tifa was perfectly content to lock herself away inside her room. The house reminded her too much of her mother but it hurt too much to think of leaving it even for a moment. Every room was filled with her mother, the living room where she'd taught her daughter piano, the kitchen where she made dinner every night, and the room she'd spent her last moments in. There were so many memories.

It was safe in her room. Safe from the memories, safe from being forced to feel too much, but even being locked away did her no good.

Sometimes she swore she could still hear her voice. In the dead of night when she finally slipped into a restless sleep she would wake to hear a voice.

Her mother's voice; always calling, always crying for her daughter. Tifa would wake up thinking it'd all been a horrible dream, only to find it wasn't. She hardly ate, she hardly slept.

On Sunday Leon had enough. He told her to get dressed and go outside.

No matter how much Tifa screamed and kicked, he wouldn't leave her be. Leon pulled her out of bed, and washed her face off; He brushed the numerous knots and tangles from her hair, and forced her to put a clean dress on. It was a pretty robin's egg blue, but Tifa hated it. It was too bright, too happy. When she was clean and dressed, he led her down stairs to the front door.

"You'll need to eat something." Leon mused, running a hand through his shaggy brunette hair. "Here," He handed her a bright shiny red apple. "Be sure to eat it." He said, kissing her on the forehead.

"I don't want to go out." She said, glaring at the apple as if it was the source of all her problems

Leon sighed, and simply opened the door. "You have to. Tifa…you aren't the only one who's upset, but we have to find a way to go on. Your mother wouldn't want this for you." He gently guided her out the door. "Come home in a few hours, I'll make dinner." He said, and just like that the door was shut and locked to keep her from sneaking back in.

'I guess it's not so bad being out here.' Tifa mused, looking out over her lawn.

It was early morning and the grass was covered in dew, the sun was _bright and warm_, and the breeze light. It was a perfect day. Tifa let out a heavy sigh, sitting on the next to last step of her house's porch. _'Mama…why'd you have to go?' _Tifa wondered sadly. As if hearing her thoughts, a swift wind blew down, chilling her to the bone; it was coming from the Mountains.

'_Wait!'_ A memory slowly drifted back to her. A story her mother had told her. _'When a person dies, their spirit passes through the mountains, to the other side.'_ The voice of her mother echoed in her head. If that was so, then maybe, just maybe her mother was there. Maybe she wanted to see her daughter.

Tifa turned her head to look at the white capped mountains peaks. If that was the case, then she surely had to go there.

"Tifa!" A voice called to her. It was Dan. "You finally came out!" he called from over the fence, flanked by Johnny, Mel. They'd been coming almost every day since the funeral.

A slight smile crossed her face. "I can't play today." She said, setting the apple on the porch and striding towards the gate.

"Huh? Where are you going then?" Johnny wondered, scratching the back of his neck.

"To the mountain pass." Tifa said simply, shutting the gate behind her with a click.

Cloud who was returning from running errands for his mother, tripped on a shoe lace, scattering his mother's bolts of cloth everywhere. He was dumbfounded by her declaration. _'Why would she want go to a place like that?' _He wondered worriedly. Everyone knew how dangerous it was up there. What with the monsters and ghost stories, it was no place for children, especially a girl. Quickly he began gather the cloth up from the ground, rushing into the house to drop it off. He knew Tifa hadn't been quite right since the funeral.

Something was wrong.

"B-but that's dangerous!" Mel cried after her.

"It'll be fine." Tifa stated, casting her determined eyes towards the sky. '_Mama will definitely protect me. She's waiting there.'_ With that thought in mind she marched resolutely down the road.

The three remaining took deep breaths, and looked one another in the eyes. They couldn't let a girl go up there alone, much less Tifa! With that in mind they rushed after her.

Cloud came out moments later, looking around for them furiously, but they were already gone. He'd meant to say something to stop her from going up there, but he had to get the cloth back to his mother. '_Tifa…'_ He thought worriedly, shaking his head for a moment. He had to hurry before someone got hurt. Cloud took off running after them, hoping he'd catch up in time.

Tifa's heart pounded in her chest, as she streaked out of town, and through the worn trail that led up the winding path. The path was clear of monsters, it was across the bridge that they would become a problem, but she knew they would hurt her. She just knew. Her feet hit the wooden planks of the rickety old bridge, it swished and swayed gentle across the chasm.

Behind her Johnny and the others slowly chickened out, too afraid to follow her across the long, old and decaying bridge. They'd all ran home and left her, but she didn't care, she could go on without them.

The sound off someone's feet tapping heavily behind her came to her ears, and just as she turned her head to see who it was, her left foot hit a rotten patch of wood. The wood splintered and the rest of her followed through the hole. A scream caught in her throat- but it never escaped as she went tumbling down.

"Tifa!" Cloud screamed after her, his hands reaching for her blindly. His hand caught her wrist but the wood beneath him couldn't take the weight, and they both went spiraling down. He clenched his eyes shut, still gripping her wrist and sent a silent prayer to whoever was listening. _'Please…please let us be okay…_' He begged.

He didn't know how much time had passed since they'd fallen, Cloud had never felt the ground or the pain that came with impact, but when he woke up he was sprawled a few feet away from Tifa's motionless form. "Tifa…" He called worriedly, crawling over to her on bleeding knees. They stung, but he swallowed down the pain. "Oh no…" He murmured quietly, brushing a lock of hair from her face. His fingers came away red and sticky.

Blood, it was matted in her hair, and streaked down the left side of her face. It seemed like so much blood. He swallowed heavily, remembering not to move her. '_You're not supposed to move a person with a head injury._' He told himself as he called out to quietly. She never answered but the gentle rise and fall of her chest gave him some comfort.

"Tifa! Cloud!" A male's voice bellowed out. It was Leon and Warren- Johnny's father.

"O-over here!" Cloud called out to him in turn. He was scared, and didn't know what else to do. It was lucky they'd come when they did.

"Are you two alright?" Warren said, quickly making his way over to the prone Tifa. A frown marred his usually good-natured face. "This isn't good…Leon we better get her to the doctors." He didn't wait to be confirmed; instead he scooped the tiny girl into his arms and made haste back to town.

Leon's sharp gaze filled Cloud with shame. "What were you thinking!" he bellowed at the petite boy. "You could have gotten her killed!" The way he looked at Cloud made him feel like dirt.

"I…" He didn't even know what to say. Instead he hung his head shamefully. "I'm sorry." It was his fault they'd fallen. He hadn't been fast enough he hadn't been strong enough to save her. Cloud couldn't forgive himself for that, not ever.

"Come on." Leon said gruffly, turning his back. "Let's get you back to town, and get your knees patched up." He didn't wait for an answer, as he led the way home. The journey was long and silent.

When Leon spoke to Ophira, Cloud felt another flush of shame from the frown that marred his mothers face. When Leon left and she shut the door, he lowered his head and bit his lip to keep the tears back. "I'm sorry." He stated quietly.

"For?" Ophira questioned, pulling out some antiseptic. She poured a bit onto a cloth and knelt to dab at his knees. It stung, and he writhed away. "Don't move." She sighed, brushing her vibrant gold hair out of her eyes. '_Oh Fenris...if only you were here._' She thought- not for the first time.

"Because I let her fall mom," Cloud stated. "I let her fall." He cried that day for the first time in years, rubbing at his eyes furiously to keep them away. He told her everything, how he had simply followed the others up the mountain because he was worried, how he had tried to save her.

Ophira simply wrapped him up in her arms, and rubbed the back of his head. "You should have told me something was wrong when you left this morning." She said lovingly, kissing him on the cheek. "You were very brave Cloud, but don't try to do things all on your own so much." She said, pulling away to bandage him up.

If his father were here today, he would have known just what to say to his son. She just knew it. _'But his not…so you'll have to know what to say._' Ophira reminded herself.

"I won't…do you think she'll be okay?" Cloud sniffled.

"I'm sure Tifa will be fine… don't worry too much about her." That was easier said then done Cloud mused.

"Oh…and you're grounded for doing something so dangerous." Ophira smiled up at him as she secured the bandages. "Now go up to bed, I'll bring you dinner."

Knowing better then to argue, Cloud fled up the steps, wincing the whole way. The whole night he spent fretting over Tifa, never even able to take a bite. Surely she would be mad at him, she'd probably never want to play again, or talk to him. 'Why couldn't I save her?' He swallowed heavily. It just wasn't fair.

The next morning he woke up to find a new book sitting on the kitchen table, a book about the great soldier Sephiroth.

From that moment onwards, Cloud became determined to be as great as him. He never lost, and he certainly never let someone who needed him down. He was a hero.

Someday, he would be like that too.

Tifa spent a week in a coma before she recovered; her father camped out by her bedside endlessly. Cloud wanted to visit, but the shame and fear of Leon kept him away. Everyday though, he listened for an update on her condition. He knew she'd wake up soon. Tifa would never give up so easily.

She woke up on Sunday, confused and in pain. "Papa…?" she called weakly, reaching out to him.

"You're awake!" Relief flooded his face. "What were you thinking when you went up there?" He questioned her angrily; his hand never left her own though.

"I thought…I could see Mama again." Tifa remembered slowly, she'd fallen from the bridge. '_Someone called my name…I heard them- but who?_ 'She wondered. "but I never did…she never came." She realized tearfully.

A heavy sigh escaped Leon's mouth. "I know you're taking it hard." He pressed his head against her bedside. "But so am I. If I lost you too, I don't know what I'd do." His shoulders shook slightly with emotion. "You're mother's left this world, but that doesn't mean you can't be happy. That's all she would ever want for you Tifa. It's all I want for you too…so don't do something stupid like this again, okay?"

Tears slowly fell down her face, and her eyes stung. "I'm sorry." Tifa whimpered burying her face in her knees. He was right; her mother wouldn't have wanted her to do something so dangerous. Not ever.

"It's alright." Leon stated, wrapping her in his strong arms. "Everything will be okay." He said soothingly.

Tifa recovered perfectly, but she could never quite remember what happened on the bridge. No one ever talked about it, but every time her father saw Cloud a strange sour expression took over his face.

Years went by and Cloud avoided her more than ever. Sometimes she wondered if she had done something to upset him, but before she could ever ask he was gone, always finding excuses to slip out of her grasp. It was exasperating. He grew taller, but still shorter than the other boys, and she began blossoming. One by one the boys left town to work for Shinra. They always called her to the well to tell her.

On the fourth year after her fall, she found a letter in her mailbox from the boy across the street. 'Cloud…' Tifa mused in surprise as she tore it open in haste. 'At the well…' A blush snuck up her neck slowly, sure she'd been invited there many times and always went, but it was different when it was from _him._

Cloud with the beautiful blue eyes and unique hair, she couldn't forget about him. Even if everyone thought he was bad news, Tifa knew he was lonely; it was in his eyes when he would sometimes glance over at everyone thinking no one was watching.

She was fascinated with him for some reason.

'It'll be hard sneaking out…but I'll do my best.' She told herself. Now that she was a little older, her father had become a lot more protective- she'd have to wait until he was asleep. Tifa squared her shoulders and glanced at the well. She could hardly wait, but she had hours to wait.

'I wonder if she'll come.' Cloud thought from his hiding spot behind a tree. He'd wanted to make sure she got the letter, and he had. 'Just play it cool.' He told himself, running a hand through his hair as he went about his business for the rest of the day.

He was thirteen now, and almost a man. He'd gotten a job to help pay for his expenses when he left, if he wanted to have money for his trip he had to work hard. Asking his poor mother to pay to send her only child off into the world just didn't sit right with him.

That and she had told him that if he wanted to go, he had to pay his own way. It was lucky she even agreed in the first place, heavens knew she was unhappy enough as it was with his decision. With a sigh, he rolled his eyes up towards the sun, his stomach filled with the sensation of butterflies in anticipation for what was to come.

The day seemed to pass excruciatingly slow, but he worked his best just like everyday. Even if his mouth felt like it was filled with cotton.

Finally, the sun went down painting the sky in hues of pink, orange and red. He'd raced home just as the sun disappeared from the horizon

It was early autumn now, so the night was cool. That night the sky was filled with stars and a clear[,] bright blue moon. He'd spent an hour sitting on the water tower waiting for her. 'She's not coming.' He told himself. 'Idiot…why'd you think she would.' He sighed, feeling the cold sink in through his clothes.

"Sorry I'm late!" A feminine voice whispered from behind him quietly.

"A-ah!" Cloud jumped slightly, almost pitching from his perch.

Tifa giggled, covering her mouth politely. "Sorry…didn't mean to scare you." She smiled, smoothing the wrinkles in her powder blue dress.

Cloud coughed, clearing his throat. "I-I wasn't scared, just surprised." He mumbled, moving to help her up the ladder.

"Thanks." Tifa grinned, sitting on the ledge of the well. For a moment their hands lingered together before Cloud hastily drew them away. "Sorry I took so long. It must have been cold out here alone."

"I thought you weren't going to come." Cloud admitted sheepishly.

"It was hard to get out." Tifa admitted, looking up at the sky. "It's a beautiful night, isn't it?" She questioned, eyes focused on the sky.

A blush rose up his cheeks as he nodded his head. "Yea..." He said, biting his lip. "Tifa…I'm going to be a soldier….I'm leaving next summer." He said, squaring his shoulders. "I probably wont be back for a while…I just wanted to tell you." He wondered if she knew that he was doing it all for her.

"A soldier…" Tifa murmured quietly, her eyes studying his face for a moment. Her lips pulled into a smile. "Make me a promise!" She cried, surprising him again.

Cloud looked at her in surprise. "A promise…" He repeated, brows furrowing.

"Mhmm…When you become a famous soldier, and I'm in a pinch, Come save me." Tifa's cheeks flushed pink, as she glanced away. "I want to experience that at least once." Being saved by a handsome knight…it was a dream all girls had.

She wanted him, to save her? That couldn't be right, Cloud told himself. "W-what…?" he wondered if he had heard her right.

"Come on, promise!" Tifa bit her lip, hiding behind her long dark hair. _'How embarrassing…he probably thinks I'm crazy.'_ Her fingers worked into the fabric of her dress nervously.

"Alright…I promise." He smiled slowly, looking up at the stars. '_She wants me to be her hero huh?'_ If only she knew that was the whole reason. Because the next time he didn't want to fail, the next time he wouldn't. _'I promise for sure._' Cloud vowed. _'I won't let you fall next time Tifa, not ever again.'_

'_He's so kind…and cute._' Tifa giggled quietly, tilting her head up towards the sky.

As if to seal their promise a shooting star shot across the sky.

'_Next time…'_ Cloud made a wish, with all his might. '_Don't let me fail_!' When he opened his eyes again, the star was gone, having fallen out of sight.

They stayed there quietly staring up at the stars and enjoying one another's company for hours. Over there heads a star shot across the sky, its destination unknown.

'_What a wonderful night._' Tifa sighed happily, leaning back against the well.

It couldn't last forever though. Soon it became too cold to say out, the flimsy dress she'd picked did nothing to ward off the chill. But she didn't want to go, so she quietly fought off the chill.

"Tifa…" Cloud said quietly, as he climbed down the well. "Come on, I'll walk you home." He said with a smile, reaching his hand up towards her. Even if they hadn't been together very long or said very much, it felt as though the huge distance between them and finally been crossed, even if just a little bit. It made him feel like walking on air.

A warm smile enveloped her face, as she placed her hand in his. "Alright." She said, as he helped her down. He wasn't like everyone thought he was, not at all. Cloud was awkward and sometimes he got into fights, but he was also warm and kind. She liked that part of him.

They walked together in silence, side by side, their hands still together as if it was the most natural thing in the world. It made Tifa feel warm and safe. They were in front of her home all too soon. Their hands un-twined reluctantly, as Tifa made her way through the gate quietly.

"Good night Cloud." she whispered inaudibly as she shut the door behind her.

Cloud made his own way home. A smile cemented in place for days to come.

The rest of the year, and the next he worked tirelessly, saving up his money. There were few and precious moments to be spent with Tifa.

Sometimes she would come by to visit his mother, for reparations on her clothes, or for a new outfit altogether.

She would chat cheerfully with Ophira and her son when he was there.

His mother and Tifa grew close easily. He was happy his mother would have someone to keep her company while he was gone, and especially glad that it was Tifa.

Other times she would visit the place where he worked at, or he would come by her home to deliver an order.

Whenever or wherever they met, she always greeted him with a bright smile, and a "Cloud! I'm so happy to see you, how are things?"

It was something people always said to one another, but when it came from Tifa, it made him feel fuzzy and warm inside.

Without a doubt, he had a huge crush on her- but then, when hadn't he had a crush on Tifa Lockhart? Even when he was young, he'd always wanted to be by her side. He'd always wanted to be smiled at by her. Cloud felt all the more determined to become a famous soldier every time he saw Tifa's smiling face. 'I can't let that face down.' He thought when it came time to leave.

Tifa and his mother had come to see him off.

That day Tifa wore a white dress, knowing this would be the last time he would see her again in a long time, he committed her gently smiling face to memory. Cloud studied her every feature, from her pale skin and dark hair, to her vibrant wine colored eyes. To him she would always be the most beautiful girl he'd ever known.

When he'd finished memorizing her, his eyes studied his own mother sad, but proud face.

There they were, the two most important people in his life, standing in the only place he'd ever known as home. In his hand he clutched an old beaten green duffle bag.

"I'm going to miss you." Ophira sniffled, throwing her arms around her son and clutching him to her chest.

So much for not embarrassing him in front of the girl he liked.

Tifa's giggling only made it worse.

Cloud blushed, as he embraced her briefly. "You're embarrassing me." He whispered, looking up as his mother just smiled at him tearfully.

"Sorry." Ophira said laughing as she let him go. "Be careful okay? And you know you can come home anytime!" She reminded hastily. "And don't forget to write!"

"I know." Cloud said, smiling at her. "And I won't." He turned his gaze to Tifa slowly; her hands were clasped behind her back as she rocked back and forth. "I won't forget our promise either." He reminded her.

A beautiful smiled bloomed on her face. It took his breath away. "I know you won't." Tifa said, handing him a brightly wrapped box. "Don't forget to write me either, okay?" She quickly threw her arms around him, her face stained bright red. "I'll be waiting!" She didn't see the bright red of Cloud's own face, when she let him go and turned away to hide her own embarrassment.

It was a perfect moment- ruined by his mother's laughter. "R-right…" He stuttered rubbing the back of his neck.

"You'd better hurry or you'll miss your ride." Ophira reminded. "Not that I wouldn't mind." She mumbled more to herself. It was a crazy idea, for all the young boys to want to join Shinra these days, and for the life of her she couldn't see why.

They were a horrible company always pushing people around because they could. She hated it. Now they were taking her son away too…but Cloud was an adult, and this was what he wanted. '_What more can I do?_' She wished dearly that her husband was still alive. It wasn't easy raising Cloud on her own.

"Bye mom…bye Tifa." Cloud waved to them one last time, before making his way towards the awaiting truck. It was going to take him as far as Costa del Sol, and from there he'd catch a boat to Midgar.

This was it, the start of his new life, his new journey.

Someday, he would come home though. Someday he would be welcomed back by Tifa. He was sure of it. With a determined face, Cloud looked towards the horizon. From now on, he had to be strong.

* * *

Well…how was that? Sorry I took so long everyone. *smiles* family emergencies and what not, but I'm back now. You might notice the first chapter looks a bit different, that's because I re-edited it and made it a little nicer. (At least I hope it was an improvement.)

I really hope I'm keeping in character, and sticking with the facts of the story and what not. If you guys think I've messed up somewhere, be sure to tell me, and I'll change it or elaborate for you.

In the next chapter, we'll be seeing how Cloud spends his time in Shinra barracks, and how Tifa came about learning her martial arts! Among other things of course :D


	3. Every Step

Disclaimer: I'm sorry to break your little hearts, but no. No I don't own any of this.

Recommended reading in 3/4. (non beta version )

* * *

_**Finding Eden**__  
__**By Tsuki Hoshino**_

_A little more persistence, a little more effort, and what seemed hopeless failure may turn to glorious success.__  
__  
-__Elbert Hubbard  
_

* * *

There was one word for what Cloud was experiencing after leaving home; misery- complete and utter misery for the last five days.

'Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to rush into things…' Cloud thought to himself glumly as he hung over the edge of the truck bed. For a while he'd been allowed to sit in the nice cool cabin. That was, until he almost threw up all over the place. Then he'd been kicked to the back to bear with his rolling stomach, harsh sun and other undesirable elements.

He could almost here his mother's amused, "_Tsk_" in his head.

"Lovely day, isn't?" The driver mused to himself cheerfully, completely oblivious to the boy in the back contemplating several imaginative ways to kill himself.

"Oh yes." Cloud moaned, hanging over the side of the truck, face tinted in a lovely shade of green. "Best day _ever._" He seethed. "Couldn't possibly get any better then this."

The man behind the wheel nodded his head in agreement, sarcasm clearly lost as he began drumming his fingers in a far to chipper manner than was forgivable in Cloud's humble opinion.

When would the torture end? There couldn't possibly be anything else for him to throw up, except maybe his actual stomach.

"What a joy." Cloud mumbled to himself after being tossed around the truck bed. 'No use in turning back now though, is there?' He wondered leaning his head back to look up at the sky. The sun was going down, and he had another day until they hit port. By then, he hoped he'd be over this motion sickness thing. Though, Nausea was preferable to going home a failure. How could he face all those smug faces who never thought he'd amount to anything otherwise?

More importantly, how could he face her after making such a bold promise? Not in a million years, that was how.

"It's do or die." He affirmed, pausing for a moment. "Well, maybe not die…" Just never see her face again. That was way worse then dying. It was almost sad how bad he had it for her.

No matter what though, he was going to reach his goal. "If you don't have confidence in yourself, you won't accomplish anything." Cloud solemnly spoke to himself, tucking his arms behind his head as he lay in the bed of the truck. The sun was slowly descending, plunging the land beneath it into twilight.

It seemed like his motion sickness had finally abated for the moment, for which Cloud was vastly thankful for. Now that he wasn't puking his guts out it gave him a few moments to put things in perspective.

He thought about home, and if his mother would be alright without him. Sometimes Cloud felt a little selfish for leaving her there all alone. "But this is for her too." He murmured to himself, wanting her to be proud of him, wanting her to be able to brag about what a strong, capable son she had was a just another driving force spurring him on.

Even though she always talked about how proud she was of him, it was something that he knew every parent told their kid. 'She's going to be fine.' Cloud decided, closing his eyes for a moment. 'Mom's really strong…' And Tifa would definitely keep her company. Which was good, he was glad they got on so well with one another.

It didn't take long for those thoughts of home to make him miss it, so his mind wandered elsewhere lazily settling on the city he was headed too.

Midgar, a city bathed in the acid green glow of mako energy. He'd heard that it was a city suspended in the sky. The most technologically advanced city in the whole world. A place where you could find just about anything your heart desired. A place that never slept unlike the town he'd come from. 'It must be something amazing.' Cloud mused to himself, mind drifting away indolently as the heavens above darkened.

In the morning he'd be in Costa del Sol, and board a ferry. Hopefully his abated motion sickness would stay away. Far, far, _far_away. That wasn't too much to ask, was it?

It didn't, and apparently it was.

Cloud wasn't sure what was worse, the five day trip by truck, or the two day boat ride which he spent hanging half way over the rail. He'd been mistaken as a "Jumper" twice. Although by the third hour on the first day he had half a mind to actually throw himself overboard to prevent any more wretchedness.

Somehow he made it through, a wonder really- all things considered. He was content to thank his lucky stars when land finally came into sight. He was the first one off the boat, and if he hadn't feared for his pride, he probably would have kissed the ground. Cloud mumbled a quick thank you under his breath to whatever force drove the world before slinging his bag over his shoulder as he wandered along the port that faced the city in looming in the distance.

Against the morning light, the green glow it was fabled for could hardly be seen.

Being so far away from home, looking toward a giant towering city all on his own was more intimidating then he imagined it would be. Squaring his shoulders, Cloud made his way forward. He had an appointment to keep after all.

Getting into the city was a task all in it's self, going beyond the train station was impossible if you didn't get a passport which stated your business in the city, and mundane things like that. When he mentioned joining the military, the woman behind the pane of glass gave knowing smile, and slipped a pamphlet underneath the cutout hole along with his passport.

"Take a step back." She directed, waving her hand at him lazily. Confused, he cocked his head to the side before hurrying to do as he was asked. After a hesitant step backwards, a flash of blinding light nearly gave him a heart attack.

"A picture for your I.D." She snickered at the startled look on his face.

Cloud's shoulders slumped. 'Eh…You could have warned me so I didn't look like a total goof.' He though in annoyance giving her a thinly veiled look of displeasure

"Just follow the directions, and stay on the train till the last stop. You'll be asked for your I.D, so just show it to them, and it'll all be good." She said. "The next train will be here soon, have a nice day. Next!"

"Thanks." Cloud mumbled, quickly shuffling to the side, doing his best to avoid the hustle and bustle of people as he settled on a bench nearby.

Opening the paper he'd been given, he took a glance at his I.D and immediately regretted it. His eyes were the size of saucers, and his mouth hung open awkwardly. It was horrible, like most official I.D's tended to be.

Next he scanned the contents of the pamphlet he'd been given, gleaning what Information he could from it until the train arrived and he shuffled his belongs back to his arms.

Doing his best to navigate through the narrow settings he mad his way into the very back of the steel cart that was soon to be packed like a sardine can. 'Is it like this all the time?' he wondered to himself, brow scrunching up indignantly when he was squashed up against a wall for a moment by a bunch of kids running by.

Shrugging it off, Cloud took a seat savoring the few moments he had by himself before he was squished between to large muscular men.

The cart he'd chosen had an unpleasant smell, and it was sorely lacking in the hygienic department. Trash was strewn this way and that- newspapers littering the floor and seats along with Styrofoam cups. Not only that but it seemed to be populated by thugs and miscreants.

'I think I picked the wrong car.' Cloud mused to himself miserably.

The ones upfront had been much nicer, probably being cleaned more often as well. Unfortunately with the way he was wedged in-between those two guys, there was no way he would be getting up until they did.

Cloud truly did have lousy luck.

One of the men besides him started making crude jokes to the other one, and they were laughing obnoxiously loud right into his ears.

Metaphorically he decided to grin and bear it, because on the outside he looked a bit like he'd had a whole mess of sour grapes for lunch and was clearly not enjoying them. Surprisingly his Motion sickness didn't return when the train set off. That was the one saving grace he could think of concerning Midgard's transportation.

When the two men he'd been wedged in-between had finally gotten off, the security had finally come to check his I.D on the way up to the plate, and when they saw the picture they had a good old laugh at his expense before leaving him in blessed silence for the duration of his ride.

He spent it having a nice long sulk.

Finally after what seemed like an eternity, he'd made it to ShinRa's headquarters and he couldn't be happier.

The upper plates stood in stark contrast to the conditions he'd first seen. In this place, the sky could be seen clearly and it was a welcome sight compared to the world below that had been dominated by steel. 'The city sure is strange.' Cloud thought to himself. Why anyone would want to block out the sun and then expect people to live below it was beyond him.

Sector 8 was filled with dazzling sights and sounds that would have been much too tempting for him to resist if he weren't so anxious. 'There's plenty of time for that later.' He reprimanded himself while tearing his eyes away from a big glitzy billboard. 'Right now you've got important things to do.'

Already his feet were nearing the looming building that dominated the city and housed that which dominated the world. It was huge, and hardly even finished being built.

It was more then a little intimidating, but then again it was meant to be.

Cloud stopped just outside the building and handed his things over to security to look through and approve after stating what his business was inside.

"Soldier eh?" One of the peacekeeping troops said, before shaking his head. "Good luck kid." He clapped Cloud on the back amiably before sending him through. "Straight to the front desk!" He reminded as the doors open and Cloud stepped through.

The boy from the country spent a moment admiring the clean cut and stylish interior. On both sides of the room, two massive stair cases with blue carpet lined with gold wound themselves up to the overhand above his head. His settings were posh and extravagant. Something one would expect only the wealthy to have.

People in business suits and lab coats milled around- and uniformed soldiers existed around the fringes keeping a wary- if not bored eye on the comings and goings.

A breathless little sigh escaped his lips. This was it. This was really it. He was really there. Gulping loudly, he hastened his steps and joined the relatively short line in front of the reception desk. When it was finally his turn, she gave him a key and instructed him to head up to the 13th floor where he could receive further directions. "Thanks." Cloud mumbled when taking the pass card being sure not forgetting his manners.

Once he stepped onto the elevator he was shocked at just how many floors the building had, it was beyond 40 stories. It was a behemoth. Pressing the button for his prescribed floor he took a few moments to lean against the wall and gather his thoughts. He was filled with anticipation and anxiety, worrying over what sort of trials he'd have to go through to join SOLDIER, and if he'd have the guts to make it.

The ride up wasn't nearly long enough in his opinion, because before he knew it the doors had opened with a screeching_ 'ding_!'

Walking through, he was met with another reception desk- this time full of young men and one or two women fastidiously filling out forums on their provided for clip boards. He knew what it was on sight.

A doctors office.

Although he'd already sent in his papers and medical records, and had been checked out by a recruiter prior to leaving home, Shinra still felt the apparent need to poke and prod everything that came through its doors.

"Can I help you sir?" The brunette secretary behind the desk asked with a smile, although the look in her eyes were screaming for him to run before he died of boredom and paper cuts.

"I-I'm here for the recruitment…" Cloud said, grateful his voice didn't crack with how high pitched it seemed right that second.

"Oh!" The woman nodded, sliding another clipboard out to him. "Just fill that out, and we'll begin your physical examination." She said, turning back to her magazine.

Nodding his head, Cloud slunk to a nice dark corner of the room and began filling out the pages. After 20 minutes of tedious work filling them out, and half an hour of watching arrivals and departures his name was finally called by a nurse.

"Strife?" She asked, glancing up at him from behind the clip board. When he nodded, she led him through the stainless steal doors and took the usual information of weight, height, pulse and everything else. Then she led him to an examination room where he waited for an hour to be seen by a doctor which he expected to be the usual middle aged, boring man.

That wasn't what he got. Instead a girl who couldn't be that much older then he came skidding to a halt into the room, her honey colored hair an out right mess.

"Sheesh." She said, hands on her hips right before a clipboard came sailing out of now where and pegged her in the head. "Ouch!" She whined, rubbing the aching spot. "That was mean." She pouted, looking at the door.

"Uhmm…." Cloud began hesitantly. There was no way this could be his doctor, she was way too young.

As though she'd completely missed his presence, she whirled around to look at him, a laughably shocked expression stamped all over her face. "Oh yea." She laughed, looking at the clipboard she'd picked up off the floor. "Cloud strife huh…" She trailed off for a moment as she read on, eyes flicking back and forth over the twelve pages of information.

Within a minute she tossed the board away, and turned back to him. "From Nibelheim for SOLDIER, Blood Type AB, no known allergies, no prior military service." Noting his startled look, she grinned. "Photographic memory-I'm not a genius for nothin' ya know?" She perched delicately into the stool across from his bench.

All he could do was nod his head at her fast speech. "Uhmm..."

Ignoring him, she continued on. "I'm Ava Estelle by the way; you can call me Dr. Estelle. Or Ava. Or Estelle." She ticked off on her fingers. " Well, I guess it doesn't matter what you call me." Estelle explained, blinking owlishly.

"Uhm…" Cloud began again doubtful he'd be allowed to finish.

"What is it?" Estelle wondered, cupping her chin thoughtfully. "Are you mute?"

"No!" Cloud snapped, shaking his head. "I just….aren't you a little…." He really loathed the thought of saying it and seeming rude. Especially if she could pass of fail him for SOLDIER.

Instead she laughed, waving a hand at him. "Young? I'm 18." Estelle said, spinning the chair happily as she giggled away. "But I guess by most standards that's young for a doctor. With Shinra though, they always want the best of the best, and despite my age I am one of the best."

He wondered why if that was the case, why was she working in such a low position Estelle seemed to sense that too, for she went on to explain that due to a certain little trick she'd played, she'd been relegated to grunt work for the next week. "It's fine though." She said, wrinkling her nose. "As long as I'm out of that lab, I'll happily do anything, even janitorial work."

For someone so small, she talked a mile a minute, and it was all he could do just to keep up with her questions with a nod for yes, and a shake for no.

After a bunch of "What would you do" and "What do you think" behavioral and mentality questions had been asked, she went into the medical spectrum, drawing blood, saliva and some skin cells to send to the labs. "I'll go over it myself later." She explained.

"Okay." Cloud relaxed slightly. Things were going well so far, excluding the crazy doctor he'd gotten. 'Although I guess this is better then some anal retentive doctor. ' He thought, looking on the bright side for once.

Estelle jumped up to her feet suddenly, throwing a paper gown at him. "Time for the physical exam!" She stated snapping on a pair of latex gloves. "Hurry up and change!" she pulled the cloth curtain shut to give him some privacy.

Cloud looked doubtfully at gown, a look of annoyance striking his face. "This thing…" It was going to be like wearing a mini skirt.

"Hey hurry up! Or do you need help getting dressed?" Estelle wondered, sounding genuinely concerned.

"No! I can do it fine." Cloud scowled before going through the motions.

After that a series of highly embarrassing things were done to him he was allowed to redress.

"Alright, now for phase two!" Estelle cried, showing him the number two with her digits as if he didn't know what the number meant. "This is my favorite part." She stated happily, leading him down the labyrinthine halls to a room with a treadmill. "You get to do all the work and I get to sit around! First we start with a test to gauge you're endurance. We'll set the max limit to an hour and see how long you can full out run." She glanced at her watch thoughtfully, before telling him to take his shirt off.

Finally, something he could do. A smile slowly crept onto his face as she applied the numerous wires and gadgets that would chart his heart rate and several other things. At this point he was hardly listening to her ramble about.

"Okay, start!" Estelle cried her eyes wide energetic as she slammed her petite fist down on a big red button. The track machine started out slow, and become progressively faster as moments passed before he was all out sprinting to keep up with it.

"See the average human can run about 11 miles per hour, some can even reach 30 miles, but its hard to keep running that fast. Soldiers can run about twice as long, twice as fast. " Estelle explained over the intercom as she settled into a chair. "Ungodly right?" She asked more to herself as she rested her chin in the palm of her hand. "When you can't go on anymore raise your hand"

By twenty minutes he was sweating like a pig, and faltering every few moments. Every now and then his feet almost tumbled off the track before he quickly picked up the pace.

When he could finally go on no longer, Thirty minutes had passed and he was pleased to say that Estelle seemed impressed with his efforts. "Not bad." The doctor mused, tapping her fingers on the panel in front of her. "Take a few minutes and then move onto the bench press."

That was decidedly easier then running. He was used to lifting heavy things from farm work he'd done in the past. Compared to all the kids in town he was definitely the strongest.

Estelle hummed to herself before calling for him to lay down the weights. "Not bad at all Cloud. There is one final physical endeavor though." She said, ushering him towards the elevator. Using her key card she selected the 34th floor and then strolled down the hall dragging him with her.

The next thing he knew he was being strapped inside a large circular cage. "What is this?" He asked, suddenly feeling quite nervous about the whole thing.

"It's called a multi axis train." Estelle replied, straightening her white lab coat and black dress. "It's gonna spin you in six different directions at once, so we can see if you can keep your cool. Basically, last as long as you can, don't panic and don't throw up. Seriously, don't do the last one." She patted him on the side of the face with a cheeky grin before skipping away. "Ready?"

On the inside, he was screaming no. On the outside, he managed what must have looked like a yes, because she flipped the machine on anyways.

How he managed a total of twelve minutes was beyond him, one minute he was whirling in all different directions, up, down, left, right, diagonal, horizontal, clockwise and counter wise and the next he was staring up at Estelle upside down.

"You okay?" She asked, lips set into a thin like as she looked at him in concern. Her kindness was rewarded by Cloud throwing up all over her nice shoes. "…." Estelle simply smiled, eyebrow twitching slightly. "I-I'll take that as a no." She stated through her teeth, before screaming for a clean up crew.

After being given leave for a few moments while she went to wash up and find some shoes Cloud went to wash his mouth and lament about his chances of joining soldier reaching an all time low level possibility of zero. 'If only I hadn't thrown up!' He pounded his fists into the sink angrily. Still, she had seemed impressed by his endurance so, there was still a chance he told himself before making his way back to where she had left him.

Instead he found her secretary, an old and scary woman that looked like death on two legs. She'd been instructed to take him down to Estelle's office and she harshly reprimanded him for being a few seconds late. 'I bet this is the one who hit her with the clipboard.' Was the first thing that came to his mind upon seeing her.

Monochromatic halls were the scenery his eyes devoured as he was led along. There was nothing of real interest on the way to wherever he was being taken.

"Thank you." Estelle said to the old woman, nervously waving at the crone when they entered her office. Papers, folders, machines and test tubes littered the lab-like room in a manner of controlled disarray. Everything seemed to have a place that no one knew the method too but the woman peering into a microscope before him.

"Yes." The croon stated, sniffling distastefully. "Be sure to clean your office, it's a pigsty." With that, she slammed the door shut behind her upon making her exit.

"Evil isn't she?" The doctor stated, face completely bleak- filled with doom and gloom. "Makes a person wonder why the even wake up in the morning," Then she was all smiles again. "Oh well!" Estelle chirped, looking back into her microscope. "While you were bonding with the lovely Mrs. sunshine I was looking over your blood work." She explained. "The good news is, you're free of any untoward diseases."

He already knew that. "Thanks…" He decided to say instead. "And the bad news?"

A tiny, sad smile placed itself on her face, and he knew. "I see." Cloud sighed, eyes lowering to the floor.

"Sorry." Estelle mumbled. "If it were up to me, I'd accept you." She said, crossing her arms to ward against the guilt sinking into her bones. "Anyways, you don't want to join SOLDIER. They have lousy pay, and their always on call." She explained at his questioning look. "Its' hell on a relationship ya'know?"

Cloud shook his head. It would be hell on his relationship- or lack of therefore if he didn't make the cut. "I made a promise." He explained, biting his lip. "I have to make it…is there anything I can do? Was throwing up what made me fail- I can not do that." He said, large, blue hopeful eyes meeting hers. It was like looking at a wounded puppy.

It made her feel horribly guilty for what she was putting him through. "Uhm…You can try again next year." She said quickly, snapping her fingers. "Yea next year you'll be fifteen." Estelle crossed her legs thoughtfully. "Tell you what." She said smilingly. "I'll be your doctor then too! I'll handle the case personally."

"That's nice of you." Cloud mumbled, feeling a little flattered that she was being so nice, especially after her tossed his cookies all over her. Although he'd failed the first time, it wasn't so bad he supposed. "What should I do until then?" he asked biting his lip. He certainly couldn't go home just yet.

"Why not join the peacekeeping corps?" Estelle suggested, riffling around her desk for some papers. "Yea…that'll help you get some experience on the field." She stated, nodding her head seriously. "I can give you your inoculations and get you signed up and ready for basic training tomorrow. They just got a new group in today! They'll let you in on short notice with my prodding. " It was perfect really; he had some pretty good luck in her opinion.

"Okay." Cloud agreed reluctantly. It was a way to keep from returning home on such short notice anyways.

The truth of the matter was there was nothing in essence baring Cloud from being a SOLDIER Candidate except the doctor sitting before him.

Although his cells _had_shown some resistance to Mako injections if done correctly and at smaller intervals he would have been fine. For her own personal reasons she was baring him from his goal.

Shinra seemed like a well enough place to work and be affiliated with on the outside. On the inside it was a different and much more torrid story. Working there was like wandering into a den of snakes. If only she had known then what she knew now... 'You check in, but you sure as hell don't check out.'

The truth of the matter was, once you've sold your soul to the ever growing monster that was Shinra, there was no turning back. Still, she took great pleasure in sticking it to the man by depriving them of test subjects and source material whenever she could. If she had her way- she'd have refused everyone who walked through the door today. Then again, that would be too obvious.

'Sorry kid.' Estelle thought as she began signing her name on the paper's she'd been handed. "Common lets go stick you full of needles." She stated happily, shoving her chair back and waltzing out of the room.

He was on his feet in seconds, following after her like a baby chocobo.

"Gee I never knew I was a pin cushion." Cloud mumbled sarcastically. For a moment she seemed absolutely stunned that he had a sense of humor before throwing out a high pitched laugh.

"Ohohoho! Someone's got a funny bone after all!" Estelle laughed, covering her mouth with her hand as she jabbed him in the ribs with her elbow. "And here I had you pegged as a no funny business- stick in the mud-kinda guy!"

Looking slightly affronted by her physical assault on his person he crossed his arms over his chest defensively. "Only sometimes."

Estelle snorted. "I take back what I just said; you _are_a stick in the mud." She mumbled upon opening the examination room door. "Take your pants off and bend over." She had to hide her smile when he looked at her like she'd sprouted wings. "What, I've already seen you nearly naked." She whined, stomping her foot. "Don't be so self conscious Cloudy-koo. The injections go in the buttocks."

Suppressing a shudder Cloud manned up and did as he was told. 'One step closer.' He told himself miserable as the humiliation commenced. 'One step closer.'

Some time later, she'd walked him down to the peacekeeper's training core and had a talk with the man in charge before returning to him. "Well this is where we say Bye bye Cloudy-koo." Estelle said, looking at him a little fondly. "Till next year or something."

Cloud found himself feeling a little sad that this was their parting. She felt like the first thing he'd met in Midgar that he could say he kinda-sorta actually liked. She was nice, if not a little annoying at times, but helpful too. "Yea." He said, looking down at his feet.

Estelle smiled slowly. "Oh I see…Your gonna miss big sister Estelle, right!" She squealed, latching onto him and cuddling him to her chest. "Don't worry! I'll definitely visit!" She pinched his cheeks between her fingers and pulled them like a piece of elastic. "So don't be so glum!"

"Never mind, I wont miss you at all!" Cloud yelped, rubbing his aching cheeks after slapping her hands away. "Whatever." He said, turning his nose up at her.

"Meanie." Estelle mumbled looking slightly hurt before making her way towards the door. "Well, you better get going for orientation; you don't want to be late for it." She said, never turning around to look at him until the last second. Her nearly ever present smile in place once more as she nodded her head at him respectfully. "Bye bye."

Cloud nodded his head back, a silent moment of understanding passing between them, and then she was gone. "Bye." He spoke to no one but himself, before making his way to the seminar, all his belongings carried over his shoulders.

After that he was assigned a bunk room, a platoon number and standard issue equipment and uniform before being allowed to settle in till the next day when his rigorous training would begin with the other runts.

He shared a room with ten other men of varies ages and backgrounds but out of them all he was the youngest and therefore the one at the bottom of the food chain. Or so one of the more obnoxious ones had pointedly told him.

"I'm Tandel." A tall, willowy man of 20 stated, taking off his helmet to reveal mousey brown hair and brown eyes before shaking Cloud's hand. "I saw you earlier at the gate." He explained, smiling slightly. "Sorry you didn't make it into soldier. Happens to a lot of us really." It was said as a comforting notion.

Cloud nodded quietly, feeling a little embarrassed. "Cloud." He introduced himself. "Its alright, I can just try again next year." He stated tiredly.

"Yea!" Tandel nodded his head in an upbeat manner. "You'll do fine."

He didn't.

Or the year after.

Both of those years had been spent failing his soldier exams, dealing with what he considered to be a vast majority of idiotic and immature roommates in a tight, close quarter's environment. Even Tandel who he had at first assumed to be polite turned out to enjoy teasing him.

Although the twenty year old asserted it was all in the name of good old fashioned camaraderie, Cloud didn't think reading the letters his mother sent him, or the very few Tifa wrote him even when he'd never written back- out loud was very funny. Cloud didn't find it amusing at all.

As a matter of fact, it pissed him off and usually ended in a friendly fist fight much to everyone else's amusement.

They were all on his shit list for some reason or another. Still, he hung out with them and ended up being the only blessed voice of sanity every time one of them wanted to pull some crazy stunt.

Which was nearly everyday. Those idiots seemed determined to kill themselves.

It wasn't such a bad place to be all in all-Sometimes. But he was still striving to become a soldier of Sephiroth's caliber.

Persistence was the key.

Estelle said he was getting better and better each year though, and that pretty soon he would definitely pass. He'd learned that her actual job was working in the SOLDIER department, so he took everything she said seriously. Except for the bad things she said about the program.

Those things went in one ear and out the other as they often did with young boys with a serious case of hero worship.

Sometimes, If Cloud was lucky enough he'd catch a Glimpse of the first class soldier's stalking the halls with all their prowess. It was always a good day for him when he did. It was like their luck rubbed off on him whenever they swept by.

He'd never forget the day he found out Estelle knew them quite well. "Those idiots?" She snorted, throwing her head back in laughter. "Nee, Cloudy-Koo, wanna know a secret about the first class SOLDIERS?" She grinned mischievously, putting a finger to her lips to signify it was on a hush hush basis.

Completely enraptured he leaned forward, eyes wide and nearly sparkling. "What?"

"They don't like needles." She stated, completely dead panned. "Especially Zack Fair. That little country bumpkin runs every time he catches sight of me." Estelle sounded horribly amused and positively devilish. She obviously took delight in being so scary a SOLDIER would run.

Looking a little startled, Cloud looked at her in disbelief. "No way!" how could heroes like them be scared of needles?

"Yes way." Estelle smiled patting him on the head. "Speaking of needles…" She trailed off, eyes catching sight of a streak of red disappearing around the corner. "OI! Genesis, get back here!" She shrieked, high heels clicking down the halls and leaving Cloud in her dust.

"I gotta draw blood or I'm gonna be in trouble again!" Her wailing could be heard from five different levels above and below the one they were on.

Cloud simply stared after her in complete and unadulterated wonder. Her speed was amazing.

Later that night, he swore he could a pitiable weeping that lasted for weeks, lingering in the halls of ShinRa's building and figured she never did catch up to Genesis Rhapsodos.

Then one day after his two year absence from home it came, the order to be shipped out and assist First Class SOLDIER Zack Fair.

It started out easy enough, get on the helicopter, go to Modeoheim and investigate some rogue Shinra SOLDIER.

The ride was quiet, the only noise being the propeller as it flew towards its destination.

Zack Fair was sleeping in the corner, dead to the world and Cloud was weighing the pro's and con's of taking a nap himself.

Then the helicopter got shot down and the feeling of free falling almost made him lose his cookies. He didn't, but the jarring the steel craft made as it hit the ground sent him spiraling into unconsciousness for a few moments.

When he woke up, he was outside the plane and staring up at the grey sky as it spit ice cold snowflakes all over his face.

"…Hey Guys!" Zack Fair called, hands cupped over his mouth as he looked high and low for his companions. Everywhere except behind him which, coincidently was where they were.

"We're right behind you." Tseng stated, brushing off his once immaculate black suit to free it from snow and whatever dirt might have landed on it.

"Oh." Zack immediately dropped his hands, and turned around, looking a little sheepish as he did so. "Right." He mumbled, making his way closer to them

Tseng looked up from his phone, and snapped it shut loudly. "No signal." He stated, sleek white face betraying no hint of annoyance.

Getting to his feet, Cloud shook off the snow, and adjusted his helmet and gear. 'Why didn't they give us coats?' He wondered, fighting off the chill.

"Well, at least we're all in one piece." Zack said ever the one to look on the bright side. "We'll be fine."

"Hm. Well, we do have someone used to the terrain." Tseng said, eyes looking straight at Zack, a faint hint of amusement lingering.

Zack rolled his eyes and held his arms out as if he were guilty of some great sin. "Yea yea, I'm a country boy. So sue me." He mumbled the last part under his breath as Tseng brushed past him. Quickly jogging after him, he soon caught up and passed the Turk. "Follow me guys!" He cried, waving a hand at the infantry men behind him before pointing his finger onwards into the distance.

It didn't take long for the Turk and the other grunt to fall behind Zack and Cloud. "Well at least someone's keeping up." Zack mused, eyeing the boy in blue that strolled easily by his side.

"Well, I'm a country boy too." Cloud explained, watching his breath turn into plumes of white in the cold wintery air. He was used to thick mountain snow. After a few moments of adjusting to the temperature, he'd quickly gotten over the initial coldness.

"No way! From where?" Zack asked arching a brow and crossing his arms over his chest as he stopped to lean close to the shorter boy.

"Nibelheim."

It sent Zack into fits of laughter.

"How 'bout you?" Cloud asked, arching a brow although the soldier couldn't see it.

Zack blinked, and jabbed a thumb into his chest. "Me? Gongaga." This time Cloud laughed, a short little bark of one. "Hey!" Zack whined. "You know Gongaga?" he asked, pointing a finger at him playfully as he moved forward causing Cloud to straighten up.

"No." Cloud covered his mouth with a fist to hide his smile. "It's just such …a backwater name."

"Ditto Nibelheim." Zack mumbled looking a little vexed as he turned away.

"Like you've been there." Cloud wrinkled his nose as his voice took on a defensive note. Quickly he moved forward as if trying to keep Zack's face in sight. He was curious about the newest first class SOLDIER.

Zack shook his head. "I haven't, but there's a reactor right? A reactor outside of Midgar usually means one thing." He said, holding up a single finger.

"Nothing else out there." The two of them said in union, smiles and laughs erupting soon after.

"Good news Tseng!" Zack cried out towards the lagging Turk a few yards behind them "Me and uh…" He looked towards his companion.

"Cloud." The infantryman said, pulling off his helmet and revealing golden locks to the world.

"Right! Me and Cloud here are both backwater experts! You're in luck!" Zack cheered, pumping his fist excitedly.

"Great." Tseng replied mock saluting them. He was looking hardly any happier then he had moments before as he struggled through the snow. "Carry on then." He waved his hand dismissively. He was of the opinion that the two of them were enjoying themselves a little too much at that particular point in time.

Carry on they did, laughing and swapping stories all the way to their destination which came all too soon in both their opinions. It was the beginning of something great, both in good and bad ways.

* * *

This chapter was a killer. I really wanted to get into the process of what it took to Join SOLDIER and why it was that Cloud didn't make it in the first place.

I decided that maybe the answer wasn't exactly because Cloud wasn't good enough, but because of other circumstances that will come into play Much Much later. (by much later I mean after Before Crisis, FF7, Advent Children, and even Dirge of Cerberus.

Originally I was planning to do it all under this story, but I think now, I'll do Finding Eden which will encompass BC and Ff7, then another story going into Advent and Cerberus, and then a final with my own continuation to wrap it all up.

The advent and Cerberus one is going to be called Paradise Lost Although I'm thinking maybe I should change the name of this story to that, and making the second one Finding Eden…Lemme know what you guys think.

Ahh, Ava Estelle was a joy to write...I enjoyed Zack and Cloud too actually!

Sorry for the super long wait by the way. Forgive this lowly worm *Bows*


End file.
